Daily Inspirational Quote

I love this one!

“You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”

― Johnny Cash

Rocking my new Kate Spade readers:)

 

I love, love, love my new readers and what a great deal I got on them... Kate Spade readers for only $19.99 at Nordstrom Rack... can I get a woot woot!!! 

Grain of Salt... AND Pepper

I was talking to someone the other day about something someone had said to me that had ruffled my fabulous feathers a wee bit.  At the end of my story my friend with whom I was talking looked at me and shook her head and said "grain of salt".  Now I value this person's opinion and perspective a great deal which is why I was discussing the matter with her in the first place.  I am a smart woman so I already try to live by the "grain of salt" theory and I try to take unimportant things in life with a "grain of salt".  For some reason I just couldn't take this occurrence that lightly and just brush it off and move on so my friends advice left me a little perplexed.  I knew I shouldn't let this bother me so why was I letting it bother me?

After much thought I came to the conclusion that there were large portions of the feather ruffling incident that were easy to let go and I did.  But there were some things that the feather ruffler had said that left me feeling quite uneasy.  That's when I decided that there must be a second part to the "grain of salt" theory because not everything is worthy of just forgetting about and moving on with your life as if it never happened.  Actually, I think it is vital to have an open file in the back of your brain where you store these things that are important but that are not worthy of further actions or thoughts immediately.  I call this file my "pepper" file.  So now I take things with a "grain of salt AND pepper".  The unimportant things go over my shoulder in the form of a "grain of salt" and the things that matter (or are hot) go into my "pepper" file where I can access them for future reference if needed.

Let me give you an example.  I once dated a guy who was straight out of a Dateline story!  He was a compulsive liar but oh so smooth.  Unfortunately I was not the first or last woman this cassanova wannabe fooled into believing he was madly in love with only to rob blind behind ours backs.  I won't go into details because he really isn't worth of another second of my time.  However, some of the stuff he did to me is stored in my "pepper" file (like telling me he had cancer when I tried to break up with him so I would let him stay, only to find out that was all a lie... who does that, right?).   By no means do I think all men are always lying to me as a result of this isolated incident but I am slightly more cautious when dating now.  For instance if a date tells me he owns his own house I just prefer to fact check (I look it up on the internet... it's fast and easy to do).  As a matter of fact I highly recommend that in any new relationship with someone who you have just met you should always proceed with caution.  Take it from me that just because words come out of someone's mouth or it is on the internet, that doesn't make it true!  I am not saying to be distrusting I am just saying don't be naive. 

Another good example is the feather ruffler from before.  I had known this person for roughly six months and she had always been quiet and demure but during this particular incident she was asking me to do something that I could not do.  Out of nowhere she turned on a dime and went all Carrie on me.  Her new persona took me by complete surprise and I had no idea what do make of the whole situation which is why I wanted to talk to my friend who was a mutual acquaintance.  When the mutual friend said "grain of salt" she followed by saying that was not who that person was and I should not judge her by that one occurrence.  So I had to think about it because what I had seen was nothing short of frightening and mutual acquaintance had never seen that side of feather ruffler before.  Mutual acquaintance was mostly right and I did take the bulk of the incident and throw it over my shoulder (behind my back where I would never see it again... grain of salt) and I still look at feather ruffler as I did before that incident .  But let me tell you, the whole Carrie scene went straight into the "pepper" file.  Trust and believe that I will never be caught alone in a room full of knives with feather ruffler:)

One other thing I would recommend is that if you are holding on to things that are not important and don't really matter (or shouldn't matter) to you, release those things.  Life is too short to dwell on things that don't matter... grain of salt.  For things you can't let go open up a "pepper" file, file them away, and move on.

Thanks for reading!  NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Turn Discouragement Into Determination

No matter how intelligent, focused, or positive you are, sometimes things happen that are going to bring you down.  The attitude and actions you choose when you find yourself in a negative place are up to you.  I will use myself as an example.  For anyone who knows me or who has been reading my blogs, you know that I have struggled with my weight in recent years.  Instead of facing my issues and dealing with the emotions that were directly linked to how I was feeling about myself because of my weight, I chose to ignore that elephant in the room.  I actually embraced the elephant as part of the family like he was supposed to be there.  Before long that elephant was my only friend (besides Ben and Jerry).  It's a lonely life when you surround yourself with negativity and let the negative emotions consume you.  There was a time that I didn't even remember that I wasn't always like that so I was just going about my life believing that being alone, overweight and unhappy were just my new normal.

One day I woke up and realized THERE IS A FREAKING ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM and it's not normal!  That's when I realized that I had to start making better choices and make some changes and quick before I ended up spending my days knitting sweaters for my 20 cats to pass the time while I was waiting to die.  Ain't nobody got time for that, especially me.  Luckily I have been blessed to have had many amazing people in my life over the years who have either inspired, encouraged or enlightened me.  For all of those people I want to say thank you a million times over because without you I would not be where I am or who I am today.

I want my happily ever after and the only person who can make that happen is this girl and I am on it!  There is no one or nothing that is going to stop me.  Now when I am getting dressed for the day and my jeans are too tight or my garage door won't open or what ever other discouraging thing happens, I just turn that emotion from discouragement to determination.  If my jeans are too tight it just makes me determined to make better choices in regards to my diet and exercise for the day.  Two weeks ago I went to leave for work and my garage door only opened half way.  I became determined to fix it myself and I did fix it and I felt amazing afterward!  Every baby step that I take that is a success just gives me the positive reinforcement that I need to keep going and never look back. 

I wrote a poem many years ago and my favorite line is "scairdy cats are afraid of goblins, ghouls and ghosts... cowards are afraid of the things that matter the most".  I have been afraid of everyone seeing me fail so I retreated and became defeated.  I don't want to be a coward anymore and I don't want to hide anymore.  I want to make everyday fabulous and full of life, hope and happiness.  This sassy, classy chick is determined to succeed and nothing is going to stop me!   I just always have to remember, don't get discouraged, get determined!


Thanks for letting me share my story with you and thank you for being here, now and always!  NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

If you want to feel happy you should watch this video!  I LOVE IT!!!

Date Like You Deserve It!

Are you tired of seeing other people that you see as being less attractive, less financially secure, etc. in a happy, successful relationship as you sip coffee at the table next to them while trying to decide what to name your new cat????? If this is you... read on!!!!

In dating there should be no rules that you have to follow! Isn't dating hard enough without having to lug some book around with you? I am going to break this down as simply as I can so that you can get on with dating yet stay true to yourself while trying to attain your relationship goals and at the same time retain your dating dignity!

My whole life I have thought men cared about your looks, your weight, how successful you are etc. The truth is they could care less about any of that stuff. They want exactly the same thing women want which is someone who makes them feel good. Don't get me wrong, if you change your name to ESPN that might not hurt but it just simply boils down to how they feel when they are around you. Men want to feel special. We know that they are "special" but they want to feel appreciated. Men want to buy you dinner and trim your trees so they can feel like the provider and the protector and you need to let them! When they have done something nice for you show your appreciation. Be happy and positive and someone that a man wants to be around. That is all they want. As women we overthink and overanalyze way too much and it can get in the way of a great relationship. When you are with a man trust me he is not thinking "Damn, her calves are a little too big for me to continue dating her". Men are not complicated. Quite the opposite actually. We make them complicated. Frankly a man isn't replaying every word that was said between you on your last date or silently critiquing your thighs. All he knows is he either feels good when he is around you and he wants to continue to be around you or he is indifferent to you and he will eventually move on. That's not to say that if you feel like you should lose 10 pounds that you shouldn't try to achieve that goal. You have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with anyone else! The point is not to obsess over small stuff because men don't really care about that stuff in the grand scheme of things. Sometimes we use excuses about things such as needing to lose a few pounds as an excuse as to why we are not finding a good relationship. If you lose the 10 pounds and you still do not find a mate then you could really beat yourself up and see yourself as a total failure. And if you lose 10 pounds you have been successful in something that is extremely difficult and should pat yourself on the back. Focus on your successes, not your failures. Stay positive and strong and eventually you will find what you are looking for!

Men and women alike are drawn to people who are happy and positive. Those are the people we all want to be around. The same holds true for dating. It is important to find someone who makes you feel good and vice versa. Most of the time you know how the relationship is going. If the relationship is moving forward, as it should be, then you know this because you will meet their friends, family etc. and incorporate one another into each others lives. On the flip side, if the relationship is stagnate or moving backward, as hard as it may be to accept, you know that as well. This phase of a doomed relationship is where most women go into denial, and yes I am oh-so guilty of this myself from time to time, and try to hold onto something that just does not exist except in your mind. Just because you like someone or have enjoyed getting to know someone doesn't mean that you have to stay in that particular relationship forever. If you want to find the right life partner you need to know when to stay and when to move on. Life is too short to overstay a relationship. A lot of times when the newness of a relationship wears off you will be able to assess the relationship fairly. You can assess a relationship at anytime and should if you are having any doubts at all... ever! If someone is making you unhappy more than they are making you happy then it is time to part ways and move on... PERIOD!!!!!!!! Do not overanalyze your decision because trust me when you break it off with the guy they just go have beers with their buddies and watch sports while you sit at home trying to overanalyze what went wrong and what you could have done differently. Instead be glad for the time you had with that person, keep smiling, and remind yourself that there is someone out there for everyone. You deserve the fairytale and should NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS THAN YOU DESERVE!

Please keep in mind that I am not a professional. There are no rules or magic spells that will make your Prince Charming fall into your hands like putty! The only thing I do know is that you have to be true to yourself. Most importantly have fun and enjoy life.

Always remember, the only person who can make you happy is you!

Thanks for reading my blog NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

M is for Morning Motivation

I used to find it so hard to get out of bed and get going in the morning.  My alarm would go off and I would hit snooze 5 times (or more) before I wouId eventually drag myself out of bed.  Even then I would just dread starting my day because I knew that meant going through the same thing day in and day out.  i  just couldn't understand how anyone could  be a  "morning person".  When every day is like groundhog day where is the motivation?

Now I totally get it because I am a "morning person".  I heard the phraseI "It's never too late to have a happy life" and somehow that just triggered something in my brain.  I never thought I was unhappy but I realized I was just existing and I decided that I want to live, not just exist! 

Starting your day off in a positive way is imperative to making your day a success.  I now have Pandora radio set as my alarm clock (if you have the app it comes with an alarm clock and the app is free if you don't already have it).  This morning the song on my alarm was Prince's "I Would Die For You".  Prince radio is one of my faves because I am an 80's girl so that is my choice and I wake up in a good mood every morning just by hearing music I love to start my day.  I continue to play Pandora until it is time for my workout and after my workout and I play it while I am getting ready for my day,

Another thing that really gets me going in the morning is getting up early.  It is a great feeling to get a lot of stuff accomplished first thing in the morning when most people are sleeping their life away.  Get a jump start on your day and get up an hour earlier to work on things you tend to put off later in the day.  This helps eliminated excuses and gives you a feeling of accomplishment first thing in the morning.  What a great way to start your day. I try to pack lunches for myself and my son the night before so I don't have to be rushed in the mornings and I go to bed early so I am refreshed in the morning instead of tired and grumpy.

If music doesn't get you in a good mood find what works for you.  There must be something that can get you pumped for the day.  Find your thing and do it!  One other thing I like to do is play games on my phone if I am having a hard time waking up.  I will play Words With Friends, Scramble or Words of Wonder just to give my brain a kick start. 

I am certain that if you get up in the morning and start your day off strong and in a positive way, whatever way works best for you, you will feel better all day!  I challenge you to try this for a week if you don't already have a habit of morning motivation.  If you have things that inspire and motivate you, please feel free to share and post your comments.  Let's keep each other motivated!!

Thanks for reading my post NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Well Hello!!!!

I love this blog and if you have read any of my posts, I think you have probably realized that I am really working on self-improvement.  This blog has totally helped me to examine myself and where I have been and where I want to be.  I have not posted for a while because I have been busy in my life going out and making things happen.  One thing that I have done is decide that my inside is pretty good right now so I need to start on the outside as well.  In order to achieve the goal of making my outside better and becoming healthier, I decided to try the Beach Body workout by Shaun T. called Focus T25.  And in keeping true to my desire to become a blogger, I decided to document this journey on another blog.  Today I wrote about my second day of workouts on that blog.  I hope you will read today's post "Day Two: Speed 1.0".

Thanks again for reading my blog.  Now go have a fabulous day!!!

Handbags? YES PLEASE :)

Diamonds are a girl's best friend and luxury handbags are her favorite companion!  If what I am about to say has never happened to you before it may sound a tiny bit weird but I am going to say it anyway!   When I find the perfect handbag it literally speaks to me from across the room and says "Tina, you have to buy me, I would look so good with you carrying me" and who can say no to a gorgeous handbag???? That would just be plain silly! Now this may never have happened to you with a handbag maybe your thing is shoes or jewelry, but if and when this does happen, you will be able to understand that feeling of utter bliss that can only be felt when the cosmic forces of the universe bring you together with the fashion accessory of your dreams.

Buying a luxury purse is really just making an investment in yourself.  The Emma Fox handbag below is my very first handbag that I have purchased from this designer and I LOVE IT!  When I am carrying her (I think of all of my handbags as members of the family... this one I call Emmy) I couldn't feel more fabulous and every girl should always feel fabulous.  When you feel fabulous you are more confident, productive and more pleasurable to be around.  So it's not only an investment in yourself, it's almost like you are doing it for others too so they won't have to be around someone who is miserable.  So the next time your husband or significant other scoffs at you for "needing" the pricey handbag that you rescued from having to have anyone else touch it at the store, just tell them you did it for their own good!  And then throw in "happy wife, happy life" or if you aren't married yet just say "happy chick, happy ____"  ( I will let you fill in the blank).  Then take your companion and go be fabulous darling!

NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Hocus Focus

Congratulations!  If you are reading this post then you have been blessed with another fabulous day to live and I want to help you make the most of this day. 

Do you want to work magic with your mind?  You can!  It's easy.  All you have to do is focus.  What do meditation and visualization have in common?  They are all about focusing.  If you want to attain your goals you have to first figure out what those goals are and then focus on making your goals and dreams come true.

Let's start with figuring out your goals.  In life we have many things that we set goals for such as financial success, buying a new car, taking a vacation, starting a family etc.  Some goals are much bigger than others and sometimes your goals may seem overwhelming.  There are short term goals and long term goals.  In order to attain your goals it is vital that you know what those goals are so keep track of them in the way that works best for you.  However you decide to track your goals, I would highly recommend that they are written down somewhere so that you can physically see them.

Now that you know what your goals are let's check them out before we go any further.  Your goals should be viable in order to achieve success.   If your goals are unattainable then you will feel like a failure and then you will likely abandon your goals and be left with feelings of inadequacy, guilt, shame and lots of other negative feelings.  I will give you an example.  Let's say your goal is to lose 20 pounds.  That is a very large goal but if you break it up into smaller, more attainable goals you will set yourself up for greater success.  Start off with deciding that this week you want to lose two pounds.  Doesn't losing two pounds sound a whole lot easier than losing twenty?  Once you have accomplished the two pound loss then set another goal, maybe another two pounds.  After your first two pound loss you will feel proud of yourself.  When you lose the second two pounds you will start to feel proud and motivated.  The positive effect will be like a snowball and before you know it you will have hit your twenty pounds! 

The next step to making your dreams come true and attaining your goals and feeling successful is the most important step.  Every day I wake up and ask what can you do today to make today successful and make me be the best I can be so that I am happy and fabulous?  I start by doing some easy stretches and breathing and focusing on my goals and check my attitude for the day.  I know that if I want to get where I want to go only I can get me there.  After 20 minutes or so of focusing, I go start my day.  This is where the hard part comes.  Once you leave the security of your own home, outside influences become a factor in our lives which could cause making good choices harder to do.  Let's take the weight loss goal for example.  If your goal is to lose two pounds this week and you go to work and it's someone's birthday so the boss brought in a giant, delicious, chocolate cake that you would normally eat and possibly go for seconds, you need to focus and ask yourself what choice can I make right here that will help me reach my goal?  Making better choices throughout your day will bring small victories which will eventually turn into achieving your goals.  Your mind is magical but only you have the magic wand that controls your magical mind so focus on your dreams and use your powers wisely.  So the next time you find yourself in a difficult situation and are tempted to make a bad decision, just pull out your magic wand and wave it over your magical mind and say Hocus Focus.

NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Daily Inspirational Quotes

I found a great website that will send an inspirational quote to your inbox daily.  I wanted to share today's quote because I love it and share the website in case you would like to get an inspirational quote delivered to your inbox daily!  The website is thoughtful-mind.com.

“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.”

― Thomas Jefferson 



















Thanks for reading this post NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Why Choose Indifference???

One of my all time favorite sayings is "There is a fine line between love and hate and it is called indifference".  I would like to think I came up with that myself but I am sure I probably just heard it long, long ago and it has stuck with me because of the power of the statement.

 

I have always had a soft heart so I have tended to get my feelings hurt very easily. When my feelings get hurt I usually have one of two reactions.  I either cry or I get over the top pissed and behave like I am going through an exorcism which is not healthy and tends to leave lingering feelings of anger and/or bitterness.  Having a soft heart also meant I was very vulnerable to being taken advantage of which is what I believe led me to have low self esteem.  Couple the soft heart with low self-esteem and you have a person who is a virtual emotional train wreck to say the least!  Mind you I am a fairly intelligent lady so deep down I always knew I should hold myself in higher regard and that I should not always take everything little thing to heart that others may think, do or say.  But as we all know things are easy to say but much more difficult to do.  So like many others I made a New Year's Resolution to become the best me.  I decided to start from the inside out.  If the inside isn't healthy it doesn't matter what the outside looks like.

 

Everyone knows that love is a powerful emotion and so is hate.  Once you have loved someone and they have wronged you it is possible that you will put them in the hate category.  You can hate someone without ever having loved them if the circumstance was severe enough to warrant this emotion.  Everything that is in the love or hate category should only be in the category for a reason.  Indifference is the emotion that is kind of ignored and not really given much thought by most people.  That is likely because everything that falls into the indifference category is something that is not worth wasting your thoughts or emotions.  Even though someone may fall into your love or hate category, if you fall into their indifferent category then they need to be demoted by default to your indifferent category because if you aren't worth their thoughts or emotions then you should not let them be worth your thoughts or emotions. 

 

Realizing that I was constantly over-analyzing everything (some people say I am OCD) and giving power to things that were either in or should have been in my indifferent category was thanks to my 14 year old son's words of wisdom.  When we would be having a conversation about something and he could obviously see me getting either sad, bitter or angry, he would always ask me why did I care so much and what did it really matter to me.  I guess he just asked me those questions enough times that I finally had the good sense to think about that myself each time I was put in a situation where I found myself becoming emotional.  Now when I sense that my emotion train is about to derail I stop and ask myself why do I care so much and what does it really matter to me.  If the answer is that  I shouldn't care and it doesn't matter to me, I just put it in my indifference category and step away.  That is when I started to learn that indifference is a very powerful emotion. By being indifferent to things that used to bother me I have made myself available to have healthy, happy emotions instead.  I am even really liking myself again.  I no longer worry about anything that people who do not matter to me think, say or do.  Indifference has been an emotional catalyst that has gotten me past my soft heart and low self esteem.  That is why I choose indifference!

 

Thanks for reading my post NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!

Welcome To Sassy Classy

Welcome to my blog!  I am so amped up to share my life's journey with the world that I hope you can feel my exhilaration as you are exploring this site.  Your life's journey and choices begin and end with your attitude and so does mine!  Every day when we wake up our day of choices begins!  I choose to be a little bit sassy mixed with a lot of classy because that's what makes me happy.  Not too long ago I used to let others effect my attitude.  I would base my attitude on their actions toward me.  Only recently have I come to realize that I alone own my attitude.   I was making myself miserable by letting others have enough power over me to control my attitude.  Today I choose to be sassy and classy and no one can take that away from me.  I feel empowered and strong and I am ready to live life to the fullest and shoot for the stars every single day!  I am tired of muddling through life every day like it's Groundhog Day.  Today I started this blog.  My dream job would be to become a professional blogger and today I choose to pursue my dream.   I hope I can inspire others to choose a great attitude and go out there and start living their life.  Thanks for checking out my blog and I hope you will come back soon!  NOW GO HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!!!